Wisdom and Discernement...

"My son, preserve sound judgement and discernment, DO NOT let them out of your sight; they will be LIFE for you, an ornament to grace your neck. Then you will go on your way in safety, and your foot will not stumble; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet." Prov. 3:21-24


"Wisdom is SUPREME; therefore GET WISDOM. Though it cost all you have, GET UNDERSTANDING." Prov. 4:7


I love the word of God. In my desire to be "his daughter" and walk and talk as He has molded me I have had to learn some really TOUGH lessons on gaining some of the fruits His Kingdom offers.  The enemy is wise in his tactics, his motives and ways...but WISDOM is wiser! Wisdom is packed with discernment that only the Good Lord can develop in a vessel (and some times that means learning the hard way, not to destroy us but to TEACH and TRAIN us all for our protection because he loves us).  


This morning I am asking the Lord to TEACH me this Wisdom He talks about in His word. Obviously it is obtainable (though it may cost all I have) Prov. 4:7 it also says that if I esteem her (interesting that Wisdom is referred to as female) she will exalt you; that IF you embrace her, she will honor you and set a garland of grace on your head and present you with a crown of splendor!  Wow, sounds good to me but really my need and desire for Wisdom ultimately lies in wanting to DO the will of God and walk being protected by Him and cooperating with Him...Wisdom is what He offers and I want it!!  So I cut and copied a little sermon/letter I found on the subject of Wisdom. It's long but OH so good!! I hope it blesses you the reader. It did me:

Let's begin by asking why is it so important? We have already seen that all men seek happiness, and that this is not bad but good. Now the reason that getting wisdom is important is that it is the practical knowledge by which we gain this true and lasting happiness. Proverbs 3:13 says "Happy is the man who finds wisdom and the man who gets understanding." Proverbs 24:13-14 says, "My son, eat honey, for it is good, and the drippings of the honeycomb are sweet to your taste. Know that wisdom is such to your soul; if you find it, there will be a future, and your hope will not be cut off." In other words, by means of wisdom you can make your way into a hope-filled future. It is the key to lasting happiness. Proverbs 19:8 says, "He who gets wisdom loves himself." In other words, do yourself a favor: Get wisdom! Get wisdom! Proverbs 8:32-36 sums it all up beautifully. Here wisdom herself is speaking and she says, "And now, my sons, listen to me: happy are those who keep my ways. . . . Happy is the man who listens to me, watching daily at my gates, waiting beside my doors. For he who finds me finds life and obtains favor from the Lord; but he who misses me injures himself; all who hate me love death." If we do not make it our aim to "get wisdom" we will suffer injury and finally death. Therefore, the command, "Get wisdom; Get insight," is very important. As Proverbs 16:16 puts it, "To get wisdom is better than gold; to get understanding is to be chosen rather than silver." It is a matter of life and death. The ultimate, eternal happiness that all people long for will only be found by those who first "get wisdom."

I say that ultimate and eternal happiness is what wisdom will bring, because I want to emphasize that not all happiness comes from true wisdom. Proverbs 15:21 says, "Folly is a joy to him who has no sense." Our thirst for happiness is insatiable in this world, and if we do not have the wisdom to seek it in God, then we will find whatever substitutes we can in the world. Terrorists may find it in shooting presidents and popes. Executives may find it in climbing the corporate ladder. Athletes in breaking world records. Scholars in publishing books. Gamblers may find it in Reno. Musicians in selling a million records. The sources where people seek happiness apart from God are countless: drink, drugs, sex, suntans, television, tubing, eating, talking, walking, etc., etc. But the happiness that these things bring is not true and lasting. It is not ultimate and eternal. It is not the joy for which we were made. And therefore it leaves us unsatisfied, frustrated, incomplete, knowing that there must be something more. But that ultimate and eternal happiness that we crave is only found by wisdom. Therefore it is supremely important that we "Get wisdom."
Let's look at some examples. Proverbs 11:2 says, "When pride comes, then comes disgrace; but with the humble is wisdom." The wise person is characterized by humility. The person who is proud does not fear the Lord, who hates a haughty spirit, and therefore can't get to first base in wisdom. But the person who fears the Lord is humble, because he depends on God for everything and fears to take credit himself for what God does. Humility in turn is foundational for the other aspects of godly wisdom because humility is teachable and open to change and growth. The proud person does not like to admit his errors and his need for growth. But the humble person is open to counsel and reason and ready to be corrected and follow truth.

Humility, unlike pride, does not recoil when commanded to do something. And this is essential for the advancement of wisdom because Moses taught us that wisdom consists in knowing and doing the commandments of God. Deuteronomy 4:5-6, "Behold I have taught you statutes and ordinances, as the Lord my God commanded me that you should do them. . . . Keep them and do them; for that will be your wisdom and your understanding in the sight of the peoples." And Jesus said the same thing about his own words, "Everyone who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house upon a rock" (Matthew 7:24). A good definition of godly wisdom, therefore, would be: hearing and doing God's word. God's word is a divine prescription for how to be finally cured of all unhappiness. Wisdom is the practical knowledge of how to attain that happiness. Therefore, wisdom is hearing and doing the word of God. But the only people who will do this are the people who are humbly relying on God for help and who fear to seek happiness anywhere but in him. Therefore the fear of the Lord is the beginning and spring of all true wisdom.

But something more has to be said about the nature of this wisdom. It is not enough to say it is a humble hearing and doing of God's word, because God's word does not address itself specifically to every human dilemma. A famous example from Solomon's life will illustrate (1 Kings 3:16-28). One day two prostitutes came to King Solomon. One of them said, "My lord, this woman and I live in the same house and we each gave birth to a son last week. And one night while she was asleep, she rolled over on her son and smothered it. So she got up at midnight and took my living son from me while I slept and left me with her dead son. When I woke in the morning and looked closely I could tell it was not my son." But the other woman said, "No, the living child is mine and the dead child is yours." And so they argued before the king. Then the king said, "You both say the living child is yours. I will settle the matter; bring me a sword." So a sword was brought and the king said, "Divide the living child in two and give half to the one woman and half to the other." But the woman whose son was alive yearned for her son and said, "No, my lord, give her the child and by no means slay it." And the other said: "It shall be neither mine nor yours, divide it." Then the king said, "Give the living child to the first woman. She is its mother." The story concludes with this observation: "And all Israel heard of the judgment which the king had rendered and they stood in awe of the king because they perceived that the wisdom of God was in him, to render justice" (1 Kings 3:28).

There was no Biblical command to tell Solomon what to do when two harlots claim the same baby. Therefore, wisdom must go beyond knowing and doing the word of God. Wisdom must include a sensitive, mature judgment or discernment of how the fear of the Lord should work itself out in all the circumstances not specifically dealt with in the Bible. There has to be what Paul calls in Romans 12:2 a "renewing of the mind which is then able to examine and approve the will of God. He calls this a "spiritual wisdom" in Colossians 1:9, "We have not ceased to pray for you, that you may be filled with the knowledge of his will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding." Of course the wisdom which follows God's word and the wisdom which discerns the way to act when there is no clear word from God are not separate. It is precisely by saturating our minds and hearts with God's word that we gain the spiritual wisdom to guide us in all situations.

So in summary when the Bible says "Get wisdom," it is referring to that practical knowledge of how to attain true and lasting happiness. It begins with the fear of the Lord and consists in humbly hearing and doing God's will perceived both in Scripture and in the unique circumstances of the moment. Such wisdom is essential because the person who has it finds life and joy, but the person who doesn't finds death and misery. Therefore, "Get wisdom! Get wisdom!"

Now finally I want to mention five Biblical instructions for how to get this wisdom. First, desire wisdom with all your might. Proverbs 4:8 says, "Prize her highly and she will exalt you; she will honor you for your embrace." These are not cheap words. To prize something and to embrace someone are signs of intense desire and love. Wisdom must be valuable for us. We must be willing to sell all in order to buy it: "Seek it like silver, and search for it as for hidden treasure" (Proverbs 2:4). Blessed is the graduate who walks through the commencement line more hungry for wisdom than when he entered school, for he shall be satisfied.

Second, since wisdom is found in the word of God, we must apply ourselves in study and meditation to know the word and do it. "The law of the Lord is perfect, reviving the soul; the testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple." (Psalm 19:7). Therefore, we must devote ourselves to know and understand the testimonies of the Lord. And here I commend not only faithful Bible study but also regular reading of great books on theology and Biblical interpretation, books that distill the wisdom of the greatest students of the word over the past 1900 years.

Now, I know what you are thinking: I don't have the time or the ability to get anywhere in books like that. So I want to show you something really encouraging. When this was shown to me about four years ago by my pastor it changed my life. Most of us don't aspire very high in our reading because we don't feel like there is any hope. But listen to this. Suppose you read about 250 words a minute and that you resolve to devote just 15 minutes a day to serious theological reading to deepen your grasp of Biblical truth. In one year (356 days) you would read for 5,475 minutes. Multiply that times 250 words per minute and you get 1,368,750 words per year. Now most books have between 300 and 400 words per page. So if we take 350 words per page and divide that into 1,368,750 words per year we get 3,910 pages per year. This means that at 250 words a minute, fifteen minutes a day you could read about 20 average sized books a year! When I heard that I went home, analyzed my day and set aside the 15 minutes just before supper to read Jonathan Edwards' big book, Original Sin. And I did it in a couple of months. Then I turned to something else. I was absolutely elated: reading that I thought never could get done was now getting done in a 15 minute slot that would have been wasted anyway. Therefore, I encourage you, there is hope. Choose some classics that you've always wanted to read (St. Augustine's Confessions, or City of God; John Calvin's Institutes; Martin Luther's Commentary on Galatians, or Bondage of the Will; John Bunyan's Pilgrim's Progress, Jonathan Edwards' Religious Affections, etc.) and set aside 15 minutes, maybe just before you go to sleep, to read. You will not be the same person next year at this time. Your mind will be stretched, your heart enlarged, your zeal more fervent. Above all you will have grown in wisdom. And it may not be long until someone says of you: "the words of his mouth are as deep waters; the fountain of wisdom is a gushing spring" (Proverbs 18:4).

The third thing we should do to get wisdom is pray. Solomon was not born a wise man. He prayed for wisdom and God said, "Because you have asked this and have not asked for yourself long life or riches or the life of your enemies, but have asked for yourself understanding to discern what is right, behold now I do according to your word" (1 Kings 3:11). And Daniel admitted that in himself he had no wisdom (2:30) but he said, "To thee, O God of my fathers, I give thanks and praise, for thou hast given me wisdom and strength, and hast made known to me what we asked of thee" (Daniel 2:23). And we have seen how Paul prayed that the churches might be given "spiritual wisdom" (Colossians 1:9) and that they might have "a spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of God" (Ephesians 1:17). And finally James puts it as clearly as we could wish: "If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God" (James 1:5). The wisdom that leads to true and lasting happiness is not natural or inborn. It is supernatural. It is a gift of God. Therefore if we would "get wisdom" we must pray.

The fourth Biblical instruction for how to get wisdom is to think frequently of your death. Or to put it another way, think of the shortness of this life and the infinite length of the next. Psalm 90:12 says, "So teach us to number our days that we may get a heart of wisdom." There is scarcely any thought that will purge our priorities of vain and worldly perceptions like the thought of our imminent death. O how cleansing it is to ponder the kind of life we would like to look back on when we come to die. There is great wisdom in such meditation. Therefore, think often of your dying.

Finally, there is one last, absolutely essential thing to do if you would "get wisdom": you must come to Jesus. He said to the people of his day, "The queen of the south will arise at the judgment with this generation and condemn it, for she came from the ends of the earth to hear the wisdom of Solomon, and behold something greater than Solomon is here" (Matthew 12:42). What an understatement. Greater than Solomon indeed! Solomon spoke God's wisdom. Jesus is the wisdom of God (1 Corinthians 1:24, 30). Others had spoken truth; he is the truth. Others had pointed the way to life; he is the way and the life (John 14:6). Others had given promises, but "all the promises of God find their yes in him" (2 Corinthians 1:20). Others had offered God's forgiveness; Jesus bought it by his death. Therefore, in him are "hid all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge" (Colossians 2:3). To know and love and follow this Jesus is to own the treasure of ultimate and eternal happiness. Therefore, the command, "Get wisdom" means first and foremost "Come to Jesus! Come to Jesus!" in whom are hid all the treasures of wisdom.

There is so much more to learn. Humbly giving my life to the Lord daily is the only way to "real truth" and the only way to "discern real truth"...so that is where i REST knowing He is faithful to grant accordingly! Please comment if this has ministered to you. I don't rely on your comments but it is helpful to know it's making a difference!

Blessings,
Sonja
daughter of the Most high God.

Never let me go...

Today was one of those days I woke kind of down. I dropped Jonah off at school, came home and opened my email and saw this video a friend had sent me. I listened to the words as she sang and tears started falling! It was one of those "pause" moments and obviously the Lord used this vessel to cause me to do just that!
The Lord is so precious in that He knows when you just NEED Him and every day He is wanting His children to JUST sit in the quiet and be ministered to! So...on my floor in my office that is what I did as this lady sang her anointed song from the Spirit of the Lord.
Then, after getting all my frustrations out, words started to flow from my heart...another silly poem. But to me, every word I wrote was from the depth of what I feel inside some times. So, I hope you are blessed too by the song and by the words! And never, never underestimate how the Holy Spirit can use you, just like He used my friend this morning to minister to me. To God be the Glory!

                                                      Never Let Me Go...
Feeling kind of lost, counting the cost of what it is to have faith in this difficult place.
I'm walking down this rode blind it seems even in my dreams.
Never let me go no matter what this life may throw.

I have to know you are here wiping away my very last tear.
Have I disappointed you My Father that at times you don't even bother?
I hope that is not the case as I long to reflect your beauty and grace.

Never let me go, I need you when I'm feeling low
for in those times is when I know you the most,
tearing every pride inside me so that I cannot boast.

You see my heart's cry, as my life passes by.
You created my frame as it is today,
so I'm asking you to help me as I pray.

Never let me go, because I'm hanging on to you,
with all I have inside, knowing and trusting you in the ride.

You are so precious to me. You died to set me free!
How can I repay such a gift so deep,
that has given me a ROCK beneath my feet?

I lie before you now in this place,
like a child seeking your face.

Never let me go, as I face the ugly foe,
then to shout the VICTORY as I make my mark in history!
To you be the Glory my Savior, my friend.
I join with you in the great mission until the end!

Things change ALL the time. Nothing remains the same. But the Lord never changes! He is the great "I AM". So in the midst of changes, some good, some out of our control, He is the one to RUN to for the anchor that holds!
And...He will NEVER let you go!

Sonja

a pause button...

I woke up this morning a little frustrated for missing church and having so much on my mind it sort of caught me a little off guard. I wasn't going to heap condemnation but I did want to STOP for a moment to reflect. Do you ever wish there was a real pause button to your thoughts? I do.

So, I decided to have my own little church time in my office. I sat in the chair wondering where I would start.  

It was that moment when the complete silence was enough to draw tears to my eyes. I really wanted to just sit for a while, not saying anything. Not expecting anything...just sit and shut my mind off. 

I know for me, when I do that all of a sudden I feel so small in such a large world, kind of like the ant on it's hill looking up!

You know it's got to be some what strange if  you were to get the ants perspective of things.

But then, ants never stop and I really don't know if they even look up (in reality that is, lol!) so it may be a poor example.

 I just know I felt small.

So why am I sharing all this? I don't know. I'm in that kind of mode. Today things stopped for a moment. And I liked it.  It was as if the Lord and I were the only ones alive for the moment. 

  I can't explain HOW those times are so important and so treasured for me. 

 It has to happen or I would feel as if I've missed something in life. 

This morning, like most when I have spent rich time in the silence, I come to know the Lord so much more as my thirst quencher, love tank filler, Joy booster, and vitamin enhancer!! 

He is my strength when my flesh just feels weak. In the end I walk away stronger.

So, maybe today you need a pause button. Maybe in the rush of the weekend, or past week you've needed some energy booster. Some thing to replace the restless thoughts. Perhaps it's just a simple encouragement from the Lord's Word. Which in my understanding of things is His love letter to us and who doesn't like a good love letter?

I will warn you though...when you do take the pause, most likely you will wrestle a bit to be still. Maybe some thing you said this week or perhaps some thing you or some one else did bothered you. Simply confess it, get it off your chest and choose to forgive yourself (as we all fall short anyways) or forgive the other person. Then determine to spend that time KNOWING a pause in it all is ok. 

The Lord is near...always near. We cannot understand it, nor comprehend it but we can have faith that it's true. 

All I know, is that when I slow down and pause, some thing supernatural happens. I may not feel it right away (kind of like when you have a head ache and you take pain medicine) but eventually you sense the peace, the calmness of you INNER man. Circumstance may not have changed around you but there is that subtle change within and you can't ignore it's effects! It's pretty amazing really. 

I am so thankful that what He has to offer is such PURE water that no other well can offer. What is awesome about HIS water is that it never runs dry even when YOU feel dry. It's always there for the taking and it's the PUREST water you can drink. 

If you do not know the Lord simply ask Him to show Himself real to you! He will. But when He does don't walk away.

He is telling you to pause and consider His love and the drink He offers you! Take it! I promise you won't regret it! 

His love is not the flawed human love we so often are disappointed with.  His Love is everlasting and never disappoints because it's never ending and it's PURE. 

I am a testimony to KNOWING this kind of Love when man's love failed me and I failed it. Only through Christ can we truly reflect the PURENESS of what Love is suppose to be. And He gives it so freely for us to come to know! Oh how I LOVE my Abba daddy!

Be encouraged today and hit that pause button!

Sonja

Shake off your dust...

Today I reflected back on a devotional i wrote two years ago. I never updated it...not sure why. But, then the Lord obviously may have purposed it that way being I almost forgot I even had this blog. 
I was suppose to be reminded of these words. The Lord wanted me to re-read so to speak what I had written back then because of what I am walking out now.
Sometimes reminders are a GOD thing. 
When writing this particular devotional i remember struggling with condemnation. I learned then that condemnation is not of God. It is not the same as conviction (where you realize your sin and then repent and are set free). Condemnation reminds you constantly of what you've done wrong, instead of what you are achieving to do right. It is nothing but bondage. 
To this day I believe many are depressed because they are dealing with condemnation instead of embracing the forgiveness and freedom Christ has to offer once repentance has taken place.
So, this is a reminder to me. And I hope a blessing to you. The Lord told me then to "set myself free" because He loves me and he's already provided the way to my freedom. I just need to choose this way (and mind you it's a daily process) in order to walk FULNESS OF FREEDOM out! 
So today...I shake off any dust and I proclaim freedom within not because I deserve it but because He offered it freely!! I hope you too will do the same next time you feel in bondage to condemnation, or anything else! CHOOSE this day to BE FREE...He is able to help you (and constantly remind you as He has done with me)!!  Here is my devotional from 2009

 Monday, March 23, 2009  
Shake off your dust...Isaiah 52:2
Shake off your dust;
RISE up, sit enthroned, O Jerusalem.
FREE yourself from the chains on your neck,
O Captive Daugther of Zion.

What holds you captive? What mindset are you stuck in? What have you not believed the Lord for? What are the chains on your neck? Is it attitude? Is it unbelief? Is it just a pattern of "self-pity" and discouragement? What is it?
Whatever it is...the Lord says to SHAKE IT OFF!!!! To RISE UP! and to FREE yourself!!!

Those are powerful action words if you ask me!
Life is too short, time is too short to wake up everyday wishing you hadn't. To wake up every day looking for that expectation in others only to find yourself captive to disappointment and chained to bitterness and lack of forgiveness!

The Lord died on the cross for us, for ALL our stinking sin! Why is it then that we choose the mentality of bondage? We have a choice! We can choose to walk out our salvation with fear and trembling! We decide to choose LOVE, LIFE, FORGIVENESS, etc...When we line our hearts up in line with what the Lord already provided...there is power there my friend!

Many times I would feel defeated and accused falsely, gossiped about etc...and I have stayed under the LIE of it's ugly affects but the Lord is saying SHAKE IT OFF!!!!! RISE UP!!!! FREE YOURSELF!!!! 

Why? Because He knows that when we line our thoughts and actions up with His word....we are actually walking in the FREEDOM He has already provided for us!!!! Has it taken me this long to learn this? Or is it that I am finally CHOOSING to act on it. Who knows but I am getting it!!! It's in my spirit...it's jumping out at me and I want you to get it too!

SO....do you feel judged? Shake it off! Are you holding on to offence? FREE yourself! RISE up my friend and don't stay in it! Speak the word freedom until freedom gets in your Heart! Until it is what you feel! Until it is what you are living! Get it from your head into your bones and watch the Lord empower you because of it!

Wow, I'm getting fired up just typing this!
Spend time with the Lord today and ask Him to reveal to you what holds you captive...then line your mind and heart up to receive His word of truth and WALK IT OUT!!!! SHAKE IT OFF and FREE YOURSELF!!!

The Spirit searches ALL things...

I pondered on the scripture in I Corinthians chapter 2 last night while having a quiet moment (the boys went to the health club). Oh how I need these times! Anyways...when I read the scripture I kept going over and over it. I guess in some way I was asking the Lord, "so...what about it?" not in a rude way but in a way that says "what does it have to do with me?"  
The Lord is so patient with us really. The scripture has everything to do with me!! I'm a believer and His word is my source of food and promise! It's not just words...it's alive, active, it will set into motion what it was meant to do...BRING truth, life, clarity, remembrance of His character, hope, peace, and so much more!
So, with all that being said, I took a moment to personalize it. And I allowed the Lord to "search my heart". He said, "the Spirit searches all things" so I expected Him to search, find, correct in love and the give me some insight...He did and so much more!!
You see, we fight as humans to "get our way". We don't trust in the God that created us and some of us just plain flat refuse to believe a God did create us...either way we are in a battle. 
The battle is within and that battle lies between the choices of Good and Bad. I love how CS Lewis explains this in his book "Mere Christianity" (I've been reading it lately)...
"God made us: invented us a a man invents an engine. A car is made to run on gasoline, and it would not run properly on anything else. Now God designed the human machine to run on Himself. He himself is the fuel our spirits were designed to burn, or the food our spirits were designed to feed on. There is no other. That is why it is just no good asking God to make us happy in our OWN way without bothering about religion. God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is NO such thing."
Wow...boldly and bluntly put and yet so true! We can TRY and create our own happiness by filling it with this or that but the truth is we will never be satisfied until we truly surrender to the God who created our happiness to begin with!!
I can argue, complain and wrestle this theory till I am blue in the face but the bottom line of CS Lewis' words are true, "He himself is the fuel our Spirits were designed to burn."  He also says in his book, and I quote: "When you are arguing against Him you are arguing against the very power that makes you able to argue at all, it's like cutting off the branch you are sitting on. If God thinks this state of war in the universe a price worth paying for free will--this, for making a live world in which creatures can do real good or harm and something of real importance can happen, instead of a toy world which only moves when He pulls the strings--then we may take it, it is worth paying." Guess I can't argue with that! lol!
So, last night as the Lord ministered some truth to my searching heart I concluded it was time to REALLY surrender what I thought my life ought to look like! If it is not rooted in Him and His ways...I don't want it in my walk. I'm not responsible for the other person, just myself. Neither are you.
"For who among men knows the thoughts of man except the man's spirit within Him? In the same way no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God. We have not received the Spirit of the world but the Spirit who is from God, that we may UNDERSTAND what God has FREELY given us".
To understand what God has given us can be DEEP, because He is just that. But a man trying to understand things in life apart from God is a man in a battle!! And until he decides to let God be the guide, his battle will be worse! Trust me, I've walked years without knowing God and it's not the abundant life the devil say's we can have apart from him, it's an empty one and the devil is deceiving and a BIG fat liar!
The Bible says that "The man without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him, and he cannot understand them (the believer), because they are spiritually discerned (the believer has his mind on the spirit)."
I'm not a master at figuring stuff out but it dose not take much for me to read this and say "I don't want to be foolish"...I want to walk after the heart of God and therefore inherit the words that to me are so rich: "No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has CONCEIVED what God has prepared for those who LOVE Him..."
So to me...whatever that means, it's GOOD!! And way beyond what the world has to offer concerning false love and stuff!! I'm in it to win the GOLD...and I'm not backing down! I'll fight the good fight until the finish line!
Be encouraged and encourage someone for we are all waging some kind of battle!!

In Christ,
Sonja

A song that leads my heart to repentance, surrender and resolve to let fate take it's course!

Wow...this song moves my heart before the Lord. All that I am. All my transparent flaws. All my questions, my fears, my doubts fade when listening to this song. 
I read a scripture early this morning while not being able to sleep. Ecclesiastes 11:5 "As you do not know the path of the wind, or how the body is formed in a mother's womb, so you cannot understand the work of God the Marker of ALL things."
"Even the Teacher, a man who possessed brilliant powers of wisdom and observation, had to conclude some things are beyond understanding. Failing in his attempt to "figure out" life, he fell back on simple advice: fear God and obey him, no matter how things seem to you."
I took this quote out of the Bible under this scripture (the student Bible, NIV). I believe this is so true. I believe this man saw LIFE in it's purest form. The Good, Bad and ugly...the injustice at times, then the blessings. Though through each he "tried to figure God out" he was unable to. He only knew God's character and God's commands so he resolved to surrender.
That is the season I am in. Possibly many of you are there too. Maybe you are not and have no clue what I am talking about...that is ok. Even the Lord doesn't make sense to us at times! lol!
So, our resolve in this life is to FEAR God...OBEY God and leave the rest up to Him. And like one saying goes "Let Him write your love story" so to speak! I like that. Now I can just "surrender" and let fate do it's thing!


Sonja

Your presence O'Lord...

I'm up this morning longing to feel your presence...though it's dry in my Spirit. I realize you show me my heart condition and the delicate way it has been beating lately. To try an protect the breech of trust it has felt would only prove to be a false one. So instead I give it to you...all of the broken places, all of the doubts, all of the fears, all of the places I do not trust. 
I attempt willingly to surrender them, knowing in you I HAVE to trust.  Who else is there that will hold my heart with such integrity and honor? When I deserved neither.  Who else would treasure the broken pieces and embrace me, instead of judging when they are scattered.
The wrestle I have is within...though outwardly I smile, laugh, and play like I am content. In reality I miss you my Master, my Friend. In reality your presence is all I long for...I would venture miles away just to find it again...just to feel it again.
That is why I can sit in a room alone, just you and me...safe to cry...safe to speak without fear of being ridiculed. Without fear of a voice condemning my own words ...even when that is the true condition of my heart. You, one of such deep, precious character...LISTEN with such passion, such love.  Then, as if nothing I said offended you, you embrace my very being and nurture those places of hurt.  By your very embrace ALL places of vulnerability flee...I am confident, secure, peacefully surrendered to your embrace! And finally...what I was portraying on the outside is truly FELT on the inside! A peace, a happiness, an inner beauty that only comes from YOUR PRESENCE O'Lord!

"As a deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the LIVING God. When can I go and meet with God? My tears have been my food day and night, while men say to me all day long, "Where is your God?" These things I remember as I pour out my soul: how I used to go with the multitude, leading the procession to the house of God, with shouts of joy and thanksgiving among the festive throng. Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? PUT your HOPE in God, for I will YET praise Him, My Savior and MY God!" Psalm 42:1-5...

"My heart is stirred by a noble theme as I recite my verse for the king;my tongue is the pen of a skillful writer." Psalm 45:1

"Listen, O daughter, consider and give ear; Forget your people and your father's house. The King is enthralled by your beauty; honor Him, for He is your Lord." Psalm 45:10